Sunday, August 17, 2008

Not about the Nurk Twins - Paul McCartney Beats Michael Jackson in Paranoia

If you haven't heard of the Nurk Twins, John Lennon explained it:

Paul and I started teaching ourselves the guitar. After school each night, we'd rush through our tea and then meet, and practice our act. When we felt we were good enough, we went for an audition, calling ouselves The Nurk Twins.

"Very good," the agent said after our performance. "I'll book you for a show in Reading." "Great," we yelled, going potty with joy. We sang several songs in that show and a small proportion of the population of Reading went mad on us.


But this post isn't about the Nurk Twins. Or rather, it's only about half of the Nurk Twins.

But let's start by referencing Those Damn Twins again. If you go to the last.fm page for their song "Polar Bear", you'll see that someone tagged the song "paul mccartney."

I think I know why.

Remember when I talked about the most paranoid song that I have ever heard? It's on the album McCartney II, and it's called "Waterfalls." And, like the rest of McCartney II, it is not cute in any way.

Just take a look at the lyrics. Here's how they start:

Don't go jumping waterfalls,
Please, keep to the lake.
People who jump waterfalls,
Sometimes can make mistakes.


Then the synthy strings are cranked to 11, and Paul wails, "And I need love...."

I swear, when you hear this song, you suspect that Paul would be happiest if Linda (who was still alive at the time, which was before her cancer diagnosis) were kept locked up in a closet, where she couldn't get so much as a paper cut.

Eventually Paul gets worried about Linda being eaten by wild animals:

Don't go chasing polar bears
In the great unknown.
Some big friendly polar bear,
Might want to take you home.


I know I've compared "Stranger in Moscow" and "Waterfalls" before, and I know I've alluded to the psychotic nature of "Waterfalls" before, but it bears repeating - this is one messed-up song.

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